Not the best way to clean dishes

This would fall under the "How the Hell Does Something Like that Happen?!?" category.

Our dishwasher wasn't doing its job. Dishes were coming out with a dry, soapy covering. So I decided to get all manly and remove the top arm from the dishwasher and poke the gunk out, replace the arm and then spin the empty dishwasher with vinegar in order to further rid the machine of calcium.

So I'm opening the dishwasher every once in a while to make sure the arms are spinning and to ensure that everything seems to be functioning.

And some water splashes out. And I close the door. And a couple of minutes later I check again. Some more water splashes out. And I hear some snapping. And I notice sparks. And I notice a smell. And then there are some flames. And it looks like there's a fire under the dishwasher. And with that...

Cue the minor, moderately controlled panic.

I tell the boys to head upstairs. My wife realizes that's crazy and we should get them out of the house. She takes them to the neighbours. Out they go. Then with fire extinguisher (eventually) in-hand, we're ready to spray it down. But the fire doesn't spread and puts itself out.

No damage to the kitchen. Everything of a flaming-nature remained contained to the area beneath the dishwasher. An uncertain, cautious sigh of relief.

After shutting the circuit breaker down and making sure no electricity was getting to the machine, I removed the cover off the bottom of the dishwasher.

It appears that the machine had been quietly leaking on the right hand side. The seal on that side was no longer as tight and waterproof as the left hand side. It's slightly rusted along the right side and there was a noticeable build-up of grease on the inside of the cover.

Somehow sparks were caused and somehow the grease caught fire. I guess. I don't know. It's the strangest damn thing. I would never thought something like that could happen: a dishwasher catching fire?!? But searching on the internet after the fact, I discovered that apparently it does happen once in a while. Who knew?

What I do now know is that the Maytag repairman could ride in on his silver horse, hop off, work his magic and declare the machine restored to all its days of magnificent glory -- and we'd still be getting rid of it.

Cuz I may not know a lot of things, but I do know this: once a machine starts throwing off sparks, it's time to go shopping for something new.