Of Course You Can't Force a Horse with Water, But You Can Lead Him Down the Path

(This was last week's greeting. We did manage to emerge victorious. Now it is onwards to the Championship game.

This was the team's inspiration / distraction / reminder for the game...)

My Fellow Dragons:

This Sunday we do battle in the semi-finals.

So think not of the Maple Leafs and their semi-feeble and certainly frustrating attempts to move towards the playoffs.

And think not of Charlie Sheen and his self-centred ramblings and self-inflected ruin.

Instead think only of victory. Sweet, sweet victory. Victory that tastes like the delicious nectar of the gods that is poured by wood nymphs who never say "No" and instead say only "Yes, we could try that."

Because the team we will be beating know not of Olympus or nectar or wood nymphs or sweet, sweet victory. The lone time they gained points against us was on October 31st when we chose to graciously cancel the game. And, because they did not show the same class and aplomb, the league saw fit to penalize us and give them two undeserved points.

These were not points earned: these were points unjustly bestowed upon an unworthy adversary.

And for that reason, we shall beat them this Sunday. We shall reflect upon their unearned advantage and then proceed to remind them on the battlefield (or, if you prefer, the 'icefield') that victory cannot be granted; victory can only be achieved through passion, sweat and honour. Their shame shall be their downfall.

(Oh, and we'll also win because their top two playmakers are also their two top penalized players and, on top of that, their goalie is a total hot-head. And somehow I'm somewhat certain that someone on our team might ever so slyly and and with smooth subtlety convince the nutty netminder into taking a humiliating but hilarious penalty that will contribute to their team's defeat. Not that I would ever suggest hassling a goalie -- no-no-no! But their goalie is so quick-tempered that I imagine that he will create problems for himself.

Truly, there is no need to antagonize the goalie; instead, we will merely present him the opportunity to display his over-the-top instability. We will show him the path and he will then willingly and merrily skip along the path and knock on the door of Grandma's House of Stupid Penalties. He will then recklessly race through her home as he strips off his clothes and casts aside his suit of sanity, he will dash into her backyard, and then with complete and total abandon he will joyfully leap into the awaiting quicksand of cwaziness. Cuz that's just the kind of guy their goalie is.)

So, Sunday. Semi-finals. Do or die. Let's have some fun and beat these guys.

Let us know if you can't make it. Otherwise, I look forward to seeing you there.

Game face on,
Kevin.