Tuesday, August 23, 2011

More coffee on the Inside than Outside


You ever have one of those mornings where the world feels just a wee bit blah?

It's funny, I'm hesitant to say "I'm kinda depressed" because that word now has this dazzling, scary weight to it, but I'm definitely feeling blah. Let's put it this way: was Charlie Brown ever chronically depressed? -- Probably not, but I'm sure that when the damn football was snatched away for the gazillionth time he probably wasn't feeling in the best of moods.

So, while it's not like I play football, I certainly feel like something has been snatched away from me.

And this is the silly stuff I do to make myself feel better...

First, a cup of coffee in a Tardis mug.

My lovely wife bought me a Doctor Who book for Father's Day (did I mention the Darwyn Cooke "Parker" page she got me for Christmas -- she is truly and astonishingly wonderful) and it was a great book but I already had it, so off I went to exchange it.

And as she said afterwards, had she seen the mug that I exchanged to book for, she would have got it for me. And there is nothing better than exchanging a gift and getting the stamp of approval for the new present. So although I went and got the mug, I really got it from her.

It is however more beautiful than it is functional. The mug is surprisingly difficult to drink from and I have to steer myself to the corners which is not where one instinctively goes to take a sip, but once I got over the awkwardness and found a way to make it work (which, I know, sounds stupid cuz IT'S A MUG but its beauty outshines its grace) it is a lovely thing. It and my Far Side 'Cat Fud' mug are treasures on a coffee needing morning.

So, cup of Tardis coffee and a bowl of cereal (Raisin Bran cuz I'm trying, really trying to be a bit healthier) as I read about Jack Layton's life. With regards to Jack: we all know the end is coming, but Layton knew his was imminent and that sense of an unavoidable closing chapter gave him the opportunity to leave with style. Quite remarkable.

And after breakfast the other silly thing I did was I opened Mister Miracle and Big Barda.

There is a wonderful comic shop in London Ontario named Heroes Cards and Comics (although I think they mostly go by "Heroes") and I was there last week as we visited my brother and his family. And I know I shouldn't have, but I ended up buying a fabulous Mister Miracle t-shirt (to which my lovely wife responded, "Does that mean you're going to cook dinner? -- Because *that* would be a miracle," which is, let's be honest, some funny shit) and of course it is a t-shirt that I don't need but it looks really geeky cool.

I grabbed two action figures as well. Hence their freedom this morning.

Years ago when "40 Year Old Virgin" came out my wife was amused with the similarities between me and the main character when it came to action figures. My boys, should they see the movie in years to come, will also marvel at the fact that "Hey, my dad didn't want to open his action figures either! We'd always ask him when he'd open the Doctor Who Dalek Attack set and he never did!"

But today -- What the hell, throw caution to the wind, be crazy! -- and out came Mister Miracle and Barda. If you know the character, you're not surprised that he escaped the packaging cuz of course that's what he does. And then he'd help Barda out, too cuz they are husband and wife. But you know all of that.

(Barda should be taller than her husband, but I guess they action figures are of a standard size but they look so nice together, free of their packaging. And yes they are standing in front of a giant Opus. I'm sure they will all get along.)

Cup of coffee in the tardis mug, open a couple of action figures and then the best part...

Zed came into my office as his mum phoned and as she & I were gabbing he starts using my 'no it's not Rory' gladiator figure from Doctor Who to quietly attack the stufffed dragon that's sitting on my desk. And as my eight year old later explained "The gladiator attacked Torch but then he realized that he's a good dragon, so they're friends now."

And with that, the morning seems so much brighter.

Between all of those things the world no longer seems so blah; instead, it's filled with creative wonder and enthusiasm. And somehow I doubt that Charlie Brown ever felt the wonderful silly grin that comes with that realization.

Monday, August 15, 2011

That Covers It

Yesterday I'm at the supermarket with the boys and I noticed that Zed, age 8, seemed all embarrassed and flustered.

I asked him what's wrong but he wouldn't tell me. I persisted and he finally confessed that he noticed a magazine cover that was inappropriate. I then explained to him that no magazine at a supermarket is inappropriate and that it's all okay. He then said that he noticed that *I* was looking at it and he didn't think it was right that I should be staring at it.

And all I could think was "You little monkey!"

Had my wife been with us perhaps I would have been more subtle. Hell, even with her absence I thought I was being subtle!! But this apparently was not the case.

But the worst of it was this: I was among men!!! And men never comment when other men are looking!!! But one of those 'men' was an eight year old boy who obviously figured his father shouldn't even be looking at images of women. Damnit.

Here is the offending (but oh so very unoffensive) cover that my son spied me looking at. I didn't even flip through the the magazine! I looked but did not touch!!

The funny thing is this: there may have been other magazines at the checkout, but my son was right cuz this was the only one that caught my eye. All other covers sit down when Rosario Dawson is on the stands.

But I have now learned that even the supermarket isn't safe when my son is watching me to make sure I'm not looking.





Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Patrick and the Playoffs

(A month away from the blog?!? Credit the volunteer work and two weeks of practicums (and the up until 2, 2 and 3:20 in the morning work that went with it) which all made me like Jack in "The Shining" (without the ax and the "Here's Johnny!" attitude). The playoff reminder for the team looked like this...)

- Where am I?
In the village
- What do you want?

Information.
-Whose side are you on?

That would be telling. We want information... information... information.
- You won't get it.

By hook or by crook, we will.
- Who are you?

The new Number Two.
- Who is Number One?

You are Number Six.
- I AM NOT A NUMBER. I AM A FREE MAN!


My Fellow Dragons:

Congratulations on the regular season and ending up as Patrick McGoohan in "The Prisoner" because in the end we ranked number six in our division.

But, let's be honest, the regular season results means sweet f.a. as we head into the playoffs cuz come the playoffs it's a whole new thang.

Two losses will mean a team is eliminated. Get to the end with no losses and you are not only crowned the winner, you also get an hour-long conservation debating the necessity of tax increases in the United States with Sarah Palin while wearing a two piece bikini. But to be clear: *you* will be wearing the bikini, cuz to picture Ms Palin in a bikini is disrespectful and sexist. But, yes, she will be keeping her hot librarian glasses on during the entire encounter. And you will be allowed to drink as many diet ginger ales as you'd like.

The playoffs start on Tuesday at 8:30 down at the MC Centre -- the site of our awesome and inspiring victory last week. And as Brent so eloquently said to my e-mail that read "victory rocks my little world," he replied "I like victory. It beats defeat ever time!"

And hence the new Dragons motto: "Victory Beats Defeat Every Time!" As a motto it states an absolute truth, but also conveys the passion and drive towards excellence that the entire team strives for. And thus it will replace the functional but slightly less inspiring former motto of "We could probably defeat Helen Keller, but no farm animals will be accepted as payment."

Gentlemen! The playoffs! Get your game face on! Bring you i.d.! And if it helps, go take 20 kids to The Smurfs movie this weekend and get angry about how you could have gone to see a good film by yourself and then spent the remaining money on beer!

Game face! Game Face!! GAME FACE!!!

Tuesday night 8:30 against the Penguins. We've tied them twice and have yet to beat them. So they're due for a beatin' Tuesday night.

Gentlemen, it's the playoffs: separating the men from the boys, the winners from the losers, and the debonair drinkers from the disgusting drunks for generations!

Sarah Palin and an unlimited quantity of diet ginger ale await!

Hope to see you at the first game,
Kevin.

GAME FACE!!!!